Many stuff.

ok, havent been blogging for so so long even if i want to. so i resorted to writing my thoughts down in my note book. but couldnt stand it anymore so here i am!! =)
I'm still having remnants of CNY fun. I mean come to think of it, i dont really have another long break that there's no exam during the first day of school. like march holidays BT1, june hols BT2, end august prelims and november is alr A levels.

for no good reason this year has been very very good for me. as in I am so so high in school. and i dont know why also. weird. haha. i mean it's like so totally different from last year when i just go to school and stone. not that i'm enthu about school but i'll get high. haha. weird, really.

CNY was superb for me. I love it to bits. we did a lot a lot of things together and i actually realise that my family has only two traits: EAT and LAUGH. But i guess that's why i love them so much. It's in front of them that i can really be who i am, sometimes though silly and lame but they accept me for who i am, and though we can laugh at each other and at ourselves, we still respect each other a lot. and we can laugh at something so simple till it seems so funny. and we can argue about which type of orange is the nicest till it's so serious but yet no negative feeling after that. it's that kind of bond that the whole family have to sit all at one table which my mom specially ordered on top on the normal one so that 16 ppl can sit together that only then we can enjoy ourself. and it's a family that everyone makes a difference, no matter how quiet you are, they'll still be sad if you're not around. i mean treasuring one another and the relationship, and it's the joy and love for one another. it's that kind of relationship where we can just sit on the table from 11am in the morning till 9pm at night eating and chatting, one round of food after another. =) wah, love them just love them.

CNY was great cos everyone came back and we just talked, joked, ate. and i got to watch my long anticipated WHITE NOISE! i mean i was quite scared but i tot that it might be interesting, cos stupid me tot it was real. but luckily we watched it in the bedroom, not the karaoke room, or i'll just die. =) then after that andy and i watched the myth. i tot that it was quite good, as in lame, but entertaining la. then on monday we went to watch fearless. i shall not reveal too much about the storyline for the sake of those who havent watched but are planning to watch. i can only say that it's superb!! I mean there was enough action kung fu, sadness, happiness and determination. It just made me realise that life is always such that you only realise certain things after you pay the price and you will never know that it's so high a price till you paid it. sad right? But thank God, I have the Holy Spirit to guide me alongso that i dont make such big mistakes that i cant afford. =)

I also went driving during the CNY break. I want to play golf la!! want to find a pro to teach me so that i can have the basic right and at least can play. still tend to forget many things. =( about posture and not looking at result. =( then i really want to faster be able to play well. there are so many things i want to do, but so little time.

These few days i've been quite troubled over career choices and what i want to pursue in life. i've been thinking about it after the CNY cos of the family shareholders' meeting and after talking to Andy yesterday. We talked about so many many stuff, had a very good talk yst. i mean it's so difficult to get into that kind of talk naturally, even with the closest of friends. =) the thing is that i really want to do something inter-personal. not that i hate finance or banking, i dont mind them but they are not really of my passion. i want to do something related with people, how they think and how to improve their lives. i dont mean medicine only or prolonging life but helping them to maximise their lives. the quality of life, not quantity of days lived.

so i was contemplating psychiatry cos i want to be the one analysing people and can even give medicine to further help me in trying to help them. psychology is not what i wanna major in cos i still need to work under a psychiatrist and write reports back. then we both will discuss abt the patients but the decision and analysis still lies with the psychiatrist. so sad right. so i wanna be a psychiatrist. but i was searching online for it. ok, i realised that i have to take 4 yrs of medicine, housemanship for a few years. then maybe i pursue my masters for let's say 2 years? work for singapore govt for 6 years!!!! before i can pursue my pHd in psychiatry. another 4 yrs to study. that means it'll be about 20 years till i do what i want to do. i then started to think if it's worth it to spend half of my career time just studying for the other half?? HALF eh!! i mean if i go other profession in 20 years time i would have climbed the ladder and be an expert in my job. another is that medicine is apparently very tough and i really have to have a strong passion to heal and help others to motivate me. for 20 years? is it worth it actually to compete and compete just for psychiatry which doesnt need those in-depth study and dissection of the organs?? !!! how?? God, can You lead me and guide me??

then dad was suggesting human resource, business management and psychology. actually i dont mind marketing too. arh, have to find out more about HRM. =) so excited about my life!! wohoo~~!! Love myself, Love life, Love the God of my Life.

Take care and GOd bless